Perhaps you don’t logically believe it, but if you suffer from imposter syndrome, there’s often a little voice whispering in your ear that no matter how competent or successful you may appear, you actually aren’t really good enough. You just got lucky, and people are soon going to realise that you don’t deserve the praise, the job or the money.
People sometimes talk about ‘healthy self-doubt’, but there’s a world of difference between accepting the evident truth that we all have limitations and fallibilities, and being crippled by such thoughts.
And when you’re running your own business, these feelings can have a very real impact on the decisions you make and the opportunities you’re willing to pursue.
Fools, fanatics and wiser people
Ironically, it’s often the most dedicated and conscientious people who suffer the most.
As Bertrand Russell is often quoted as saying:
‘The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.’
There’s also a psychological phenomenon known as the Dunning–Kruger effect, which describes how people who aren’t particularly skilled or knowledgeable in an area may also lack the awareness needed to recognise their own limitations. As a result, they can seriously overestimate their abilities.
And while the reverse isn’t automatically true, those with more knowledge and experience are often much more aware of how much there still is to learn.
Which can sometimes lead them to doubt themselves far more than is healthy.
Who experiences imposter syndrome?
Imposter syndrome is much more common than you might think.
Research has found that people of all ages and backgrounds can experience these feelings, including highly successful and experienced professionals.
It’s often associated with women, although research suggests that both men and women experience it, and the findings about gender differences aren’t entirely consistent.
One factor that can play a part is feeling like an ‘outsider’. For example, women working in traditionally male-dominated professions, or people from a different social class, cultural background or ethnic group from those around them, may feel a particular pressure to prove that they belong.
This can be exacerbated when someone feels that they’re somehow expected to represent everyone ‘like them’, and that any failure on their part will reflect badly on the whole group.
The impacts of imposter syndrome are not to be dismissed lightly.
It can make you super-sensitive to criticism, which in turn may lead you to avoid taking risks or doing anything for which you might be criticised.
It can lead to overwork, as you constantly try to make up for your perceived inadequacies by working twice as hard as anyone else.
It can cause you to procrastinate because you’re worried that the work you’re doing won’t be good enough.
It may turn you into too much of a people-pleaser, always afraid to say no and taking on far too much in order to avoid criticism.
And, at its worst, it can lead to complete paralysis, as you fail to move forward in your business or do any of the things you really want to do.
Do you recognise yourself?
Perhaps you’re recognising yourself, or your students (or both), in some of this description?
It wouldn’t be unlikely.
When I originally wrote this article in 2020, I was working with a small group of ELT professionals, including language trainers, teacher trainers, writers and editors, on a 12-week programme to support them in developing their businesses.
While the business training, in things such as what to put on your website or LinkedIn profile, how to develop a following on social media and how to negotiate, was obviously important, the work we were doing on mindset, and particularly imposter syndrome, was just as vital, if not even more so.
Every single one of the group members admitted to having experienced it.
And that really didn’t surprise me.
I regularly come across freelance language professionals who have years, sometimes decades, of experience, and yet still struggle to see themselves as experts, charge appropriately for their services or put themselves forward for opportunities.
They know an enormous amount, but somehow it never quite feels like enough.
How to overcome imposter syndrome
So, how can we beat imposter syndrome?
Well, in my experience, both personally and through working with others, the more you try to overcome or fight these kinds of negative thoughts and feelings, the bigger they seem to get.
It isn’t about stopping the thoughts, but about learning not to take too much notice of them.
They’re just thoughts. You don’t have to believe them.
Yet we all know that thoughts can feel very real and overwhelming.
Perhaps the first step is to admit these thoughts to someone you trust. You may well find that they’ve experienced similar feelings themselves.
This in itself can be a huge relief, as so many of us have held these self-doubts inside like a ‘big secret’.
Then start trying to ‘catch’ the thoughts as you have them.
To give an example, someone on my group programme expressed the thought:
‘I can’t start a blog because I have nothing interesting to say.’
Rather than simply accepting that thought as the truth, you can start questioning it.
Here are three coaching questions you could try, based on the work of Byron Katie.
1. Is that really true?
Ask yourself whether there’s any actual evidence for the thought.
In the case of having nothing interesting to say, for example, is that really likely to be true?
If it were, presumably nobody would ever want to have a conversation with you!
Perhaps you don’t yet know exactly what you want to write about, or you’re worried that other people know more about the subject than you do.
But that’s very different from having nothing interesting to say.
2. How do I behave or react when I believe that thought?
Try writing down everything you notice, from the physical sensations to the bigger consequences.
Perhaps your jaw tightens, your stomach clenches or you start feeling anxious.
Maybe you find yourself procrastinating, avoiding putting yourself forward, or spending hours researching something you already know quite a lot about.
And perhaps, over time, believing these thoughts means you remain stuck in a job you hate, fail to develop your business or never take the opportunities you really want.
It’s worth recognising just how much influence these thoughts may be having over your life.
3. Who would I be without that thought?
Now imagine that the thought wasn’t controlling you.
What might you do differently?
Perhaps you’d finally start writing that blog, approach a potential client, put your prices up or apply for an opportunity that currently feels completely out of reach.
Allow yourself to imagine what it would feel like to have a bit more freedom from that particular belief.
You don’t have to suddenly become someone who never doubts themselves.
But what might be possible if you stopped automatically treating every doubtful thought as the truth?
Don’t try to suppress the imposter thoughts
You don’t have to suppress the imposter thoughts. Just start recognising that they’re often the result of old beliefs and patterns of thinking, rather than an accurate assessment of your abilities.
The better you get at noticing and questioning these thoughts, the less power they’re likely to have over you.
At first, this can feel hard. You’re so used to automatically believing everything your thoughts tell you.
But it gets easier with practice, rather like developing an unused muscle.
And remember that you don’t have to wait until all your self-doubt has disappeared before you start putting yourself out there.
You can feel uncertain about whether you’re good enough and still take the next step. You can worry about what people might think and still share your ideas, promote your services or apply for an opportunity.
In fact, each time you do something despite those feelings, you’re giving yourself more evidence that you can cope, even if things don’t go entirely according to plan.
And the more you practise this, the freer you become to share with the world all the brilliant things that you can do.
Want to feel more confident running your business?
If self-doubt, imposter feelings or your Inner Troll are getting in the way of making decisions, putting yourself out there or charging appropriately for your work, I’ve brought together some practical resources to help.
In my Feel more confident running my business Resource Centre, you’ll find articles and videos about recognising your expertise, overcoming unhelpful beliefs and developing the confidence to build a business that works for you.
Explore the Mindset and Confidence resources
This article was originally published in the August 2020 edition of Neurolanguage Collective Magazine.