When we think about developing good habits, we often think about things like drinking more water, getting up more often from our desk, eating more healthily and so on.
These kinds of things are important, of course, but something which is often overlooked is the importance of developing new and better mindset habits.
The way we habitually think about ourselves, our work and the things that happen to us can have a huge impact on how we run our businesses. And developing more helpful ways of thinking can support us in achieving our more concrete goals, as well as making a real difference to how we feel along the way.
So, here are ten good mindset habits that I think are worth developing.
1. Stop setting unrealistic goals
Stop setting arbitrary and totally unrealistic goals, and then wondering why you haven’t achieved them. Even worse, then starting to beat yourself up for not having achieved them.
It’s very easy when you’re running your own business to get carried away with everything you want to do. You decide you’re going to completely redesign your website, launch a new offer, start a podcast and post on LinkedIn every day. All while continuing to work with your existing clients, of course.
And then you feel like a failure because you haven’t managed to do it all.
Recognise that even very small changes, such as an extra ten minutes of exercise a day, can have a huge impact over a year.
So, when setting yourself goals, think small and consistent. What could you realistically do regularly that would make a difference over time?
2. Focus on what you can control
Recognise that while planning can be very helpful, we can’t actually control the future.
You can create a brilliant offer, promote it carefully and do everything you reasonably can to make it successful, but you can’t force people to buy it.
And you certainly can’t control what other people think about you or your business.
So focus on what you can control, such as the actions you take, how well you prepare, the decisions you make and how you respond when things don’t go according to plan.
And stop trying to control what you can’t.
It’s an enormous waste of energy, and rarely makes us feel any better.
3. Banish ‘should’
Banish ‘should’ from your vocabulary.
I think ‘should’ is often about not taking responsibility for our own choices. It’s a way of distancing ourselves from whatever it is, suggesting that other people think it’s a good idea.
I should be posting more often on LinkedIn. I should create an online course. I should be working harder on my marketing.
According to whom?
If you actually think something is a good idea for your freelance business, decide to do it. Make a plan, allocate some time and get on with it.
If you don’t think it’s a good idea, or it isn’t a priority right now, then don’t.
But stop making yourself feel guilty about all the things you supposedly should be doing.
4. Celebrate small wins
Get into the habit of regularly celebrating your small wins.
We’re wired up to take more notice of negative outcomes, which is why we’ll often hold onto the one small piece of criticism in an otherwise glowing review.
This tendency makes sense in terms of survival, but it won’t necessarily make you feel good about yourself or your business.
It’s particularly easy when you’re self-employed to spend all your time focusing on what you haven’t achieved yet. There’s always another goal, another task or another thing you could be doing better.
I end every working week by noting down all my wins, as well as what I can learn from anything that didn’t go quite so well.
And I’m not just talking about the big things, such as signing up a new client or making a sale.
Perhaps you finally had that difficult conversation you’ve been putting off, sent an email to your list or made progress on something that’s been hanging around on your to-do list for ages.
Notice those things too.
Because recognising what’s going well helps you understand WHY something worked, so you can do more of it.
5. Rethink being productive
Productivity isn’t about chaining yourself to your desk and working away for 12 hours at a time.
It’s about getting better results in LESS time, which is about focus and prioritising, rather than simply working longer hours.
You can be incredibly busy all day and still not make much progress on the things that actually matter.
And, if you want to be more productive, take more breaks.
Longer ones, for sure. But five-minute, or even one- or two-minute breaks can also be really valuable.
Get up and move around, go outside for a few minutes or simply sit and rest your eyes and breathe deeply.
You’ll probably work much better afterwards.
And remember that sometimes the most productive thing you can do is decide that something doesn’t actually need doing at all.
6. Learn to recognise the Troll voice
Maybe the most important of these mindset habits is getting better at recognising your Inner Troll.
It often uses extreme language, such as ‘disaster’, ‘terrible’, ‘never’, ‘always’ and, of course, ‘should’.
You make one mistake and suddenly you’re hopeless at running a business. One person doesn’t buy your offer and clearly nobody ever will. Someone makes a mildly critical comment and it’s an absolute disaster.
Sound familiar?
If you spot that voice, take a deep breath and ask yourself whether what it’s saying is absolutely true.
Is there any actual evidence?
If not, don’t pay interest on trouble you haven’t borrowed yet.
7. Don’t believe everything you think
This is closely related to point 6.
We tend to assume that because we’re intelligent, rational people, our thoughts must also be intelligent and rational.
But an awful lot of them are influenced by anxiety, fear, old beliefs and habits, and need to be taken with a LARGE pinch of salt.
Just because you think something doesn’t make it true.
Perhaps you think you’re not experienced enough to charge higher rates, or that everyone else is doing much better than you, or that you’ll make a fool of yourself if you start putting your ideas out there.
But are those facts, or simply thoughts?
Learning to notice the difference can be enormously liberating.
8. Don’t be afraid to change direction
Running your own business is perhaps best seen as a series of small experiments.
Sometimes these will pay off, and sometimes they won’t.
So don’t be afraid to change your mind or change direction.
There’s something called the sunk cost fallacy, which is our tendency to continue with something that isn’t working because we’ve already invested time and/or money into it.
Perhaps you’ve spent months developing an offer that isn’t attracting the right clients. Or you’ve invested a lot of effort in a marketing activity that’s producing very little return.
It’s tempting to carry on simply because you’ve already put so much into it.
But that doesn’t necessarily make sense.
Of course, it’s important not to give up on something before you’ve given it a proper chance. But equally, continuing to invest in something that clearly isn’t working can just make the situation worse.
Accept that sometimes we need to make mistakes to learn something valuable, and move on.
9. Accept and recognise your feelings
It’s also completely normal to feel a bit wobbly sometimes as an entrepreneur.
You might be disappointed, anxious, frustrated, envious or even rather fed up with the whole business of running a business.
That’s fine. You’re human.
Accept and recognise your feelings. Pretending you aren’t feeling something doesn’t make it go away. It just buries it deeper, where it can cause more problems.
Research suggests that putting feelings into words can help us regulate our emotional responses.
So rather than trying to push an uncomfortable feeling away, try naming it.
Perhaps you’re feeling anxious about launching an offer, or disappointed because someone you thought would become a client has decided not to go ahead.
Recognise the feeling, and then consider what it might be telling you.
Negative feelings can be useful signals that something needs our attention, although they aren’t necessarily an accurate reflection of what’s actually happening.
And you don’t have to let them dictate what you do next.
10. Act with self-compassion
Treat and talk to yourself the way you would your best friend.
Offer support, be honest, but always kind.
If a friend told you they’d made a mistake in their business, would you tell them they were completely useless and clearly weren’t cut out for self-employment?
I hope not!
And yet, how often do we talk to ourselves in exactly that way?
Self-compassion doesn’t mean pretending everything is wonderful or avoiding responsibility when something goes wrong.
It means recognising that you’re a human being who will sometimes make mistakes, feel overwhelmed or struggle with something.
Just like everyone else.
If you find this difficult, journalling can be a good way of developing a more self-compassionate inner voice. Try writing down what you’d say to someone you really cared about who was facing the same situation.
Then see if you can offer yourself some of that same understanding.
Which mindset habits could make the biggest difference to you?
You probably recognise some of these habits as things you’re already quite good at, and others as things you could do with working on.
And that’s fine.
I certainly wouldn’t suggest trying to develop all ten at once. That would rather defeat the object of number one!
Instead, choose one or two that you think could make the biggest difference to the way you feel about yourself and your business.
And then start practising them.
Because the more we make these ways of thinking habitual, the less effort they require, and the easier it becomes to make decisions, deal with setbacks and keep moving forward.
So, which of these mindset habits are you going to work on developing?
Want to feel more confident running your business?
If self-doubt, perfectionism or unhelpful habits are making running your freelance business harder than it needs to be, I’ve brought together some practical resources to help.
In my Feel more confident running my business Resource Centre, you’ll find articles and videos about dealing with your Inner Troll, challenging unhelpful beliefs, overcoming self-sabotage and developing more confidence in your business decisions.
Explore the Mindset and Confidence resources