Running a freelance teaching business is demanding – physically, mentally, and emotionally.
You probably already know you “should” be looking after yourself and your business better. Maybe you’ve promised yourself you’ll finally sort out your website, get more sleep, post consistently on LinkedIn, or raise your rates.
And yet, within weeks (sometimes days), those good intentions slide.
Yes, some of this is about the real pressures of running a business and juggling life. But often there’s something deeper going on. Even when we know something will help us, even when we want to do it, resistance has a way of stopping us in our tracks.
Two types of resistance
I see two main types:
- Resistance to change (sticking with what’s familiar, even if it isn’t working).
- Resistance to looking after ourselves (believing our needs don’t matter, or that it’s “selfish” to put them first).
Let’s start with the first — because it’s the easier one to explain.
Resistance to change.
It’s said that around 95% of brain activity is subconscious. Most of what we do is on autopilot. That’s great when it comes to walking or breathing. Less great when it comes to unhelpful patterns, such as undercharging, overworking, or defaulting back to “safe” but unsustainable ways of working.
The brain builds shortcuts (neural pathways), and it doesn’t like to abandon them. On a primitive level, your amygdala is wired to keep you alive, not happy or fulfilled. So if you’ve survived so far by charging £15 an hour on a platform, your brain thinks: Great, let’s just keep doing that.
Change feels risky. Which is why it’s so common to reach for old patterns — whether that’s “just one more student at a low rate” or hiding from marketing altogether — even when you know those choices are keeping you stuck.
How to deal with resistance to change?
There are four approaches that make change easier:
- Smooth the path. Don’t rely on willpower. If you want to market consistently, set aside time in your calendar and prepare posts in advance. If you want to rest, log out of teaching platforms at the weekend so you’re not tempted to check messages.
- Start small. Big leaps trigger big resistance. Rather than deciding you’ll suddenly replace all your income with a group programme, start by piloting one small group alongside your 1:1s. Incremental shifts are easier to sustain.
- Build mindfulness. So much resistance happens on autopilot. A regular mindfulness practice helps you notice the moment you’re about to say yes to another low-paying client — and gives you space to choose differently.
- Get curious about what’s underneath. If you’ve been trying to make the same change for years and keep sabotaging yourself, it’s time to look deeper. That resistance is almost always tied to old beliefs.
Common beliefs that drive resistance to self care
Many of us carry beliefs we absorbed early on, without even realising. Here are three I see often among freelance teachers:
- “It’s selfish to put myself first.” You keep saying yes to unsuitable clients, giving up your weekends, or working late nights. But neglecting your own needs doesn’t just harm you — it harms your teaching, your relationships, and eventually your business.
- “I have to be strong.” You push through, convincing yourself you don’t need rest or support. It works for a while, but it’s a fragile strategy. Everyone needs systems, self-care, and support to thrive.
- “I don’t deserve kindness.” This is the toughest one. If you grew up with a lot of criticism, it’s easy to believe self-compassion is indulgent. But it’s not. It’s the foundation for running a sustainable business. Without it, you’ll always be waiting for someone else to give you permission — or for burnout to force your hand.
Working through resistance to self-care
This kind of resistance isn’t ‘just my personality’. It’s simply the way your brain has been wired up until now- and this wiring can be changed.
It takes time, consistency, and often support from others who can remind you that looking after yourself is looking after your business. Small changes compound. New beliefs replace old ones. And gradually, the resistance softens.
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Want help moving past both types of resistance?
One of the best antidotes is being able to see that you’re not alone with this kind of resistance, and helping others work through the ame challenges. When you’re surrounded by peers who are making changes too, it becomes easier to believe you can do it, and to keep going when your brain is screaming for the old, “safe” way.
That’s exactly what we do inside Designed to Flourish, my six-month programme for freelance language teachers. Alongside clear business strategy, you’ll have a supportive community to help you face resistance, rewire unhelpful patterns, and make changes that actually stick.
If you’re ready to stop circling the same habits and start building a business that feels good and works, find out more about Designed to Flourish here.